The dreaded good-bye event for a Collegue who is leaving. My introverted brain fires up – it’s hot out will there be a shady spot in the bar garden? Will we be crammed around the table? Should i get a present? Will I have to pretend I am sad she is leaving? Shall I even bother to go?
I went. Armed with my new philosophy: turn up when I want, leave when I want.
Oh no! Shady spot is taken! I just ask if I can have shady position – it’s mine now, that wasnt so hard. I buy one small beer, have a quick chat, simple. I stand up to leave. Can’t think how to say goodbye. I demand a hug. Big warm hug. Done, now I can go.
Feeling good – I actually made effort to socialise. Loving this hugging thing. Easier than words.
That’s one event down. Now one to go. I’ve been invited to a BBQ party by a colleague. He is always nice enough to chat to but don’t really know his group of people. I know one actually, she is introverted I think, I will hang out with her at the party…
Collegue said to bring swimming costume since he has set up a pool as it will be hot. O.m.g. I don’t think I will be comfortable with that. Maybe I won’t go. 2pm until late apparently. Introverted brain is whirling away again…
2pm ’til late, that sounds like a long time! Its at someone’s house, I don’t fancy queuing for the loo. Where to park? Am I really going to turn up wearing swimming costume? It’s a BBQ, my colleague will be busy cooking and I will have to talk to people I don’t know.
I will go. My new philosophy again. I will turn up late and go early.
Its 4.30 pm, nice and late. Nowhere to park. Will just have to squeeze car into this hedge. Yep; colleague is cooking at end of garden. It will have to be walk of shame past all these people. Glad I left swimming costume at home. I grab a cool beer from an ice bucket and sit in a shady spot with some dudes.
Chat goes fine. They are not particularly intimidating, just goofy lads. Saved by food being served. I spy that potentially introverted women I have met before. I will sit with her on long comfy chair.
It’s weird now I know I’m introverted. It’s even weirder I know I’m introverted and talking to someone introverted. She knows it as well.
Wow we have so much in common. “funny how people form groups” she says, “i quite like sitting alone”. Just like myself. Strange how introverts actually ask me how I am doing, what i am up to. Rather than everybody talking about themselves.
Think I have found a soul mate. She is 50 and I’m mid 30s so we wouldn’t normally have much in common. If I hadn’t found out I was introverted and what it means to be one I would probably just not made conversation with her.
“I don’t want to be the first to leave but I want to go early” she says at 6.15pm.
“me too” I said.
“when shall we go”?
“6.30?” I reply. Off we go. Loved that. Understood each other. Each go our separate ways.
Forgot the hug! Damn it!